HOW RURAL DO I NEED TO BE?

If I am bugging out, how rural do I need to be?

Good question.  From what I see of most people, their bug out location is not rural enough.  Most people buy a property in the country and think they can use it as a bug out location.  However, there is still a paved road leading up to that location.  If there is a paved road or a even a dirt road leading up to your bug out location, it is probably not rural enough for a scenario where society completely collapses.  Having a road leading up to your location just makes it easier for gangs and refugees to find your house.  What will you need a road for once society collapses?  You won't.  So make the choice to go even more rural.

In order to decide how rural you should be, you need to first figure out your goal.  Is your goal to survive or is your goal to help rebuild society?  The two are not mutually exclusive, but the more aggressive you become in attempting to rebuild society, the riskier it will be to survive.  The one who is more interested in rebuilding society, can live closer to populations and be more visible, while the one whose utmost concern is surviving, should live with his group in as remote a place as possible that still allows for comfortable provisions by way of crops and what can be harvested from the wilderness nearby.  The main reason for this is that humans are going to be the number 1 threat post-collapse, so the best way to ensure survival is to get very rural.

I have a window of acceptability when it comes to deciding how rural to be.

If your goal is to survive, you should bug out to a location that is:

at least 2 mi from any paved road
at least 1 mi from any dirt road
at least 200 mi from any large city
at least 5 mi from any small town
not directly upriver from a population center
has a water source year round
has arable land
has wood available

If your goal is to rebuild society, you should bug out to a location that is:

at least .5 mi from any road
at least 60 mi from outskirts of any large city
at least 3 mi from any small town
not directly upriver from a population center
has a water source year round
has arable land
has wood available

The main difference here is that with the goal of rebuilding society, you will live closer to populations and will be able to reach out and adopt refugees, settlers, and natives of the area.  You can gather numbers together more quickly (as long as enough food is available) to join your group, become your neighbors, or join your trade/defense network.  If you are in a location that is extremely rural, you may never come across refugees and gangs, which makes it safer.